When I was in my forties, I had lost some weight and decided that the next step was to get more physically active. I decided that I wanted to learn yoga and nervously signed up for my first in-person yoga class.

I did my due diligence prior to going. I called ahead and spoke to the teacher and explained that the extent of my yoga practice thus far consisted of following along with the YogaKids Videos with my son when he was little. She said that was fine! Come to the class! It’s for all levels!

And so I went. I found myself in a class full of elite students who were doing handstands! As I wrote in my book, Honor Your Health, this class ended with me on my mat in Child’s Pose, face down, crying, wondering how I ever thought that yoga was something that I could do.

Fortunately after that, I did find a wonderful yoga teacher and throughout my fifties, I had a regular exercise routine that included a yoga class at least once a week. I’d tried many types of yoga of the years, but my favorite style was Anusara. Then Kristen, my favorite yoga teacher (who became a dear friend), moved to North Carolina (lucky, lucky North Carolina!) five-ish years ago, bringing my yoga practice outside of the four walls of my home to a screeching halt.

Recently, I retired from my career as a Telehealth Nurse. Hurray! I was no longer tethered to a computer for most of my waking hours. I started working a couple of days a week at QUEST Fitness. A benefit of the job was a free membership to the gym, so now, in my sixties, I began taking exercise classes in the real world again, many of which were yoga classes.

Last week, I signed up for a class with a teacher who was new to me and discovered that she practiced Anusara Yoga!

I loved this class so much! I loved how it was structured. I appreciated how she layered the poses and built toward what I think of as the “pinnacle pose” of that class, giving us students a better chance for success in it. I loved the humor and warmth of the instructor. I benefited from her hands-on adjustments and verbal cues. I welcomed the sanskrit music and the chimes from the bells and the chanting Om together as a group. I loved how, as the class drew to a close, she jokingly described “Savasana“–the moment we had all been waiting for!–as the pose that we all knew was the real reason we all came to class!

As I settled into the pose, I became overwhelmed by a wave of emotion. There I was in yoga class all these years later, on my mat, face up, crying, because I had been given back what I hadn’t even realized was missing for me in my yoga practice.

My connection to my heart.